My journey is reflective of glad days and sad days. This 365-day-a-year journey is not ordinary or routine, even though every single day is a battle. Every battle is different even if the sin which I toil with can sometimes be the same. This journal entry was conceived when my life became an all-out target for the enemy. I can remember when getting out of bed was a struggle. I can remember when my thoughts became a war zone. I had to develop a minute-by-minute exercise to keep my thoughts pure. As I struggled daily to push through the quicksand of life, I became a judge and jury for my actions. It felt as if my flesh had turned against me. Not only was I warring with natural tendencies, those natural tendencies had become idolatry from which there was no escape. There was no getting away from myself and these strongholds. Although, my war was carnal, my weapons were not. They were mighty in God for the pulling down of strongholds, 3 For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. 4 The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. 5 We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. 2 Corinthians 10:3-5
I am learning daily that there is no room in my life to give up in my effort to walk holy and circumspect before man and unto God. My life must be an example of what the bible speaks is true. That truth is that I have been born again, washed in the blood, made new, Holy Spirit led, and live by faith. God forbid: Yea let God be true, but every man a liar; Romans 3:4a.
Once, I learned how to fight an offensive war, my days became more joyous and less tiring, more peaceful, and less depressing. I wish I could say that there was totality in joy, fatigue, peace, and depression, but I cannot. Even though, I pinned this forward in past-tense, the war continues. Do not be discouraged by this snapshot of my journey. There is a peaceful ‘happy’ ending to my journey…it is called eternal fellowship with Jesus Christ, my Lord and Savior. That is the hope that fuels me for the journey that transports me toward my final destiny.
It is fixed, I cannot get off, start life over, stop what has been predestined, or surrender to the barriers. So, I embrace my wins and my losses. I hope you enjoy my freestyle writing that is simple, intimate, transparent, and true. Basically, it is just Zephany. That is all I know how to be. I pray that you are moved and encouraged to embrace your wins and losses. Remember it is all about the destiny. So, do not get hung up on the journey, it’s a moving target that God set in motion. He is the conductor.
The journey flows…
Heavenly Father, help me to humble myself before you as I bury myself deep into your bosom when I lean into you for comfort. You said that you will comfort me in all of my iniquities. Help me with my desire and my effort to walk holy despite of the constant adversarial attacks. You are a constant in a perfect way. Thank you for never leaving me. You are a true faithful friend. This is my prayer, in Jesus name amen.